One of my favorite questions to ask is, ‘What are you most excited about at the moment?’ or, said differently, ‘What are you most looking forward to right now?’ Either of these questions opens the dialogue in a way that allows me to learn about the person’s interests. Inevitably, as the conversation continues, ideas will come to me of people I might introduce this person to, resources they might find valuable, or ways in which we might collaborate. I’ll offer three recent conversations to illustrate my point.
Making an introduction
In a meeting with an executive director of a nonprofit organization, our conversation arrived on the topic of the board of advisors that she is beginning to assemble. During our discussion, she offered her vision for how she saw this board being able to help shape and support the strategy of the organization. Given my background in building and developing boards, I asked her what areas of expertise she was looking for at this time. She shared that she was being very thoughtful and deliberate in pacing the formation of the board and that the individual she was looking for at this moment was someone steeped in emerging technologies. Given what I’d learned about the organization, about the executive director, and her vision for the board, I was quickly able to think of a handful of people that I thought would have a genuine interest in this opportunity. I happily offered to reach out to those I’d identified to see if they might be interested in potentially joining this board.
Sharing resources
As I’ve mentioned elsewhere, I have a few accountability partners. We meet regularly. During one of these meetings, the person mentioned that she had been asked to facilitate some work for one of her clients. While she had been doing coaching and workshops for them, she wasn’t sure about how to approach this more comprehensive project. We spent a bit of time talking about the outcomes the client was hoping to achieve by bringing her in, which parts of the work she felt confident in and which she needed help with. I was able to send her materials to not only help her craft the contract and scope but also with some of the content itself.
Collaborating
A friend of mine and I were having dinner a few weeks ago, and we started talking about how it would be cool if we found a way for our two areas of expertise to come together so that we could present together and work together. We both got excited by the seed that was planted in that conversation, but at the moment, neither of us had any idea how to make something happen from it. We both kept thinking about it until we learned about a conference where we could weave her research on community-building with mine on transformative teaching and learning to explain how organizations can engage their various constituencies in change.
In each of these examples, the opportunity was not the purpose of the conversation. In other words, the executive director did not meet with me to ask me who I might know, my peer did not meet with me to ask for help with the proposal, and my friend did not meet with me to ask how we might work together. It was only by being open to and curious about how the conversation might unfold that I was able to discover ways in which I might be able to help each person take a step toward their goals. I say ‘might’ because, in each of these cases, the individual may not be interested in the ideas I have to offer.
While I have positioned this blog through the lens of how I unlock opportunities to help others through conversation, you could also reverse this process and use conversation to share with others what you are most excited about and looking forward to. You might be surprised by the resources, connections, and collaborations that come from that dialogue.
